When we got married, my wife chose not work. She stayed home for almost three years and those were the best years of our lives. She used to pamper me, cook for me and take care of the house. However, I somewhere felt bad for her because she was a qualified professional. So I pushed her to look out for a job. Ever since she has gone back in the corporate world, she is getting regular promotions and salary hikes and has suddenly become very ambitious and is ignoring our marriage for work. We are not even able to plan a baby because she puts down the topic every time I bring it up. I don’t want her to think I am jealous of her success but I would rather have her to stay at home than this. How can I deal with this situation?
Answer by Shweta Anand: First of all, I appreciate that you showed supportive behaviour towards your wife in letting her pursue her career. I understand a women has to take care of household activities but that should not be a hindrance for her to pursue her career goals. In todays world its more about balancing out the tasks ( work-life balance) and conversing with each other priorities that need immediate attention and importance. I am sure your wife would be consciously aware of her responsibilities and she would take further action in taking steps towards family planning , which you will need to explore by communicating at length as per convenience of both of you. The worry for the future that gets created in us is more imaginary than realistic, give the present situation some time and discuss priorities with each other that would benefit both of you and further enhance your relationship with each other for the present as well as for future.
Shweta Anand, Research Scholar on positivity & mental health at Nottingham University, U.K Licensed clinical psychologist ( Gold Medallist)
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