Do you have a text-blasting partner?


While communication is an important part of a relationship, demanding an update every few minutes can be quite annoying. With faster internet connectivity, being in love and staying in touch is easy and so is the need to be connected throughout the day. If your partner texts you more than the routine ‘Good Morning’,’Good Night’, ‘What are you doing?’ and ‘I love you’, and instead bombards you with texts and chats throughout the day without giving a breather, it’s time you raise the red flag.

What is text-blasting?
The act of non-stop texting people throughout the day — about anything and everything under the sun is nothing but text-blasting. What is more annoying is the fact that text-blasters also expect the other person to be equally responsive to their messages. Nishant Gandhi, a psychologist, says, “There are some who do not care about your busy schedules. Their only motive is to occupy their partner’s mind space and engage in random conversations whenever possible.”

Reasons why people text-blast
Being insecure
Gandhi says, “Text-blasters attempt to constantly remind their partner about their presence and the fact they are thinking about them every now and then. In fact, these people get paranoid if their partners do not reply to their texts for a while.”

To occupy mind space
This is a tactic that some people use in order to engage their partners. They constantly keep texting them about random things, so that their minds are occupied with their thoughts and they are almost unable to think about anything else.

Incapability to talk
Clinical psychologist Shikha Verma, says, “In some cases, it is a genuine issue of a person being unable to talk face-to-face. There are people who find it difficult to share their thoughts or express freely. It is through texts that they try to convey their feelings and that is why this medium of communication becomes important for them.

Becomes a habit
Some people begin and end the day by looking at their phone screens. For them, texting is a necessity. They can’t do without it for a long time — they feel the need to send and receive text messages constantly and wish to keep chatting with people throughout the day. But text-blasters do it more with their partners.

To get a kick
Preeti Nair, a relationship counsellor, says, “When it comes to people who are in a new relationship, text-blasting each other gives them a kick. They enjoy endlessly chatting with one another. Seeing a message pop up on their phone screen gives them a certain high; the fact that they are constantly on each other’s mind excites them.”

To strengthen bonds
For some, text-blasting is a way to stay connected with their partners, emotionally. They feel that texting them frequently will help them understand each other better. Keeping in touch with each other most of the time is their way of showing concern and they feel that it will enhance their bond.

“Although, constant texting is encouraged in most new relationships; seasoned ones do not need several text messages for partners to convey their feelings or express love,” adds Nair. In fact, after a point, constant messaging gets extremely annoying as it ends up distracting the person from living in the real world, and keeps him/her from concentrating on other important things.

 Leads to ignorance
“Most partners who are at the receiving end of this, try to put up with their significant other by frequently replying to their messages. However, when it becomes a norm, they start ignoring these texts, be it by making excuses or by staying away from the exercise by choice,” says Raktim Sen, a clinical psychologist. This ignorance further becomes a part of their relationship, even when they are together, which leads to rifts between them.
 Increases misunderstandings
It is often observed that things said over a text message cause more damage than the ones communicated in person. “That’s because, when in text, one doesn’t understand the tone and expressions of the person, which creates misunderstandings. Hence, we always encourage people to talk to each other rather than expressing themselves over text messages or chats,” says Neha Rajane, a counsellor.
 Can lead to suffocation
Text-blasting engages a person so much that it does not allow them to think about anything else but the person who’s texting them constantly. This suffocates the other person and can lead to people falling out of love, as they feel that the person is trying to be a complete ‘pile-on’.

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