Well, this is a question that I have been asking myself for quite some time now. Sex is important, very important, but is it the top most priority in a relationship? Both men and women equally love sex. Let’s take the following instances:
Why do people cheat in a relationship? Looking at it, most people do it because they do not get good sex from their spouses. I can have a boyfriend who is perfect, has lots of money and truly loves me, but still, I will cheat on him. Human beings have wants, and if they don’t get them right they tend to go find it somewhere else. The same case applies to men, a beautiful girl, the perfect body shape, loving and caring but the guy will still cheat because the sex is not good.
Someone once told me that there’s nothing so confusing to a woman who has a rich man but loves sex with another man, a not so rich man. I mean, any woman would want to live in a comfortable house, drive a nice car, be treated like a lady, but if the sex is not good, where does that leave them?
Let’s look at the most common thing today, before two people start dating they have sex. If the sex is good, the relationship might last, but if the sex was not good on the first day, you don’t really expect that relationship to last, do you? That is why I wonder whether sex is the most important thing in a relationship.
When it comes to women, there is the performer and the non-performer. For us women, I believe that communicating to your partner about how you want him to make love to you is important. Did I say make love? Yes. Women don’t just love sex, they adore love making, which is very different from just sex.
I have heard of instances where divorced men claim to still be in love with their former wives. When you ask them why they ended the marriage, they will tell you “we stopped having sex, I cheated on her and the rest is history”.
Why do we claim to deeply love our spouses but go ahead and cheat on them? If the issue isn’t sex, then I don’t really know what is. If you love your spouse, that means there is good communication, attention caring and all the things that make you love that person, but when you get the urge to cheat, look closely, you are not ‘getting it’ right.
Few months back, there was this woman who claimed to be leaving the husband whom she dearly loves, for a ‘makanga.’ Why on earth would this woman do that? Why end a relationship because you have stopped having sex with your partner? Why leave your spouse, someone you claim to love, because of sex? Is sex so most important in a relationship, that you are ready to call it off if you aren’t getting it good?
There is no way you can say that the best sex is with the person you love, because there are people who have had one night stands and have had the best sex ever. There are people who fall in love with their spouses because they had the best sex with them.
If we take an analysis, you will find that a greater number of people cheat because the sex they get from there partner is not as good as they would want it to be. This is compared to the number of people who cheat for other reason. If someone falls in love with a person because the sex is good, the likelihood of that person to cheat is minimal compared to the one who fell in love because of looks and money.