Men aren’t always the best at expressing our emotions. It’s not that we can’t talk about our feelings—we just don’t even stop to think about them very often. Emotion, especially the lovey-dovey stuff, is kind of like elevator music to us. It plays softly in the back of our heads, but most of the time, we’re barely listening.
That’s why I sympathize with any woman trying to figure out how a guy really feels. Most of the time, the guy probably doesn’t even know. Sure, he was just in the emotional elevator this morning, but he was too busy checking his phone for Twitter updates to notice what was coming out of the speakers.
But ladies, there is hope. Because even if your guy doesn’t immediately tell you how much he adores you, he’s probably giving off signs that he’s falling for you. Here’s what to look out for:
1. The more banal the message, the more love-drunk he is. For instance, if he texts to tell you he’s drinking a margarita or that he just saw a cat that looks like yours, he’s been struck by Cupid’s bow. What he’s really saying is, “I remember you said you like margaritas,” and “I don’t even mind that your cat hates men.” He’s also saying, “Right now I wish you, and your evil cat, and I were all drinking margaritas together.”
2. There are three reasons men pick up the phone: (a) for work, (b) for emergencies, or (c) to hear someone’s voice. And if you’re not a co- worker or a 911 operator, then it’s your voice that he’s interested in. That’s a true sign of lurve.
3. Girls only text guys that text them back, right? So if she stops texting, it means he did, too. Or it means he put his foot down. I once had a
girl who kept texting me silly stuff late at night after I’d already started developing feelings for another girl. So I told Ms. Texty to stop. Hey— that’s not an easy thing to do! You have to be pretty sure you want out of the dating pool before you drain it entirely.
4. “What should I write in my brother’s birthday card?” “Do these shoes look OK with these pants?” “What color sweater should I buy for my dog?” These are all questions guys only ask if they are drunk on love hormones.
5. Nobody knows your guy better than his friends. So listen up: If they say something about how he’s been a turd of a wingman lately, or if they ask him whether he’s misplaced his testicles, they’re not just being vulgar. They’re actually making astute observations about subtle behavioral changes that you may not have picked up on. So thank those knuckleheads because now you know your guy’s putty in your hands.